(Photo: BEELEZABUB a/k/a THE DEVIL at a FAUST-MEPHISTO Faux Drag Ball He'd Rather Not Tell The Wife About)
"It's a slap in the face to the future's false history" quipped THE DEVIL. "2012? Ha!"
He'd been trumped.
The often publicity shy BEELEZABUB a/k/a THE DEVIL issued this stinging rebuke to "End Times" preachers throughout the world.
Taking a break from his wide ranging daily activities of evil-doing, from fatal diseases and horrific disasters... to making certain that you lose your cell phone... this Famous Fallen Angel is damn efficient.
So it was surprising to see a string of Tweets, Posts & Etsy listings decrying the fraud that has befallen the gullible public.
Of note was his cryptic comment: "I am so sick of these Amateur Fortune Tellers: I could spit enough fire & brimstone-- the Rivers of Mylanta & Pepto-Bismol would run dry."
When told that these drugs were readily available in packaged containers, that there were never "rivers" of either, THE DEVIL changed the subject in his own rant. (Note: He's slated for next season's "Celebrity Apprentice: Special Victims Unit".)
Still it was unprecedented for a such an underworldly figure to come out against the wacko preachers who've hustled the poor of their cash, cheated the sick from their health and filled local TV with some really annoying programming. OK, now I get the end of days. Endless identical programming on every device. Hell.
Clearly the work of THE DEVIL, no?
Well. No. It is what he does for a living-- and the dead. And yes, messing everything up is his true gift. At best you can say he's professionally horrible.
But this time it was a sub-human being, one of our own No-Televangelists who outfoxed THE DEVIL himself.
Now have you seen THE EXORCIST? Linda Blair's career didn't survive, so why ever would yours? Trust me: You don't want to get on THE DEVIL's bad side-- especially on a Wednesday for some reason.
"It's rare to find someone worse than myself" said the THE DEVIL with a cigar in one hand and a worn copy of "Pumping Iron" in the other.
"But these prophets for profit? I mean, have you ever seen me predict the end of the world? Only a schmuck says something that stupid!"
AliasDanny@Rocketmail.com
www.WhenDannyMetSally.com
Copyright WDMS 2012
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